Prior to Laura’s accident I had one primary role that I was concerned with: the working dad. Like many (but not all) families, I am the primary bread-winner who would work long hours and do a lot of travel to provide the income for our family. I played an active, but sometimes aloof role in the family as my commute and daily schedule kept me out of the house for 14+ hours per day. Upon reflection I know this wasn’t the ideal way to be a husband or father and it really wasn’t fair to Laura, Andrew or myself but I was able to rationalize it as being “necessary for the family” and with Laura’s help we made it work.

Fast forward to the present. Obviously the status quo wasn’t going to work while Laura made her recovery and that meant I had to change. It’s really no secret that the past few months have been pretty complicated for me. As the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months, I’ve had to rise to a new set of challenges while trying to maintain some semblance of normalcy in my life. I believe it was Cicero who said:

“It is the character of a brave and resolute man not to be ruffled by adversity and not to desert his post”

I feel like the quote pretty accurately describes what I have experienced and learned over the past two months. It hasn’t been easy wearing all of the hats that I have had to at home and at work. My days begin even earlier than they had prior to the accident and every minute of my day from the time I wake up until the time I go to bed are filled with activity. I no longer have time for the things I used to enjoy (spending time blogging for example) and I have replaced it with responsibilities like cleaning, laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, etc. That’s not to say that I didn’t do any of these things previously, but with Laura and I taking care of them together we could divide and conquer and the burden seemed like it was so much less. I have also found myself being the primary caregiver for Laura, Andrew (our son) and Mackenzie (our border collie). This was yet something else that I wasn’t ready for.

Yet despite all of the stress and challenges somehow I managed to make it through. Quite honestly, I have to give most of the credit to our family and friends who have gone above and beyond to help in so many different ways. So today I am truly “Thankful” to all of you and the myriad of others who have called, visited, emailed, dropped off meals, sent gifts, cooked, cleaned and stayed with Laura while I have been away and generally made our life a lot easier. If not for the people that we have surrounded our lives with and have the honor to call our friends and family.

Laura still has a pretty long road to recovery ahead of her but she is making a lot of positive progress. She is going to therapy a few times a week and her left ankle is healing very nicely and her doctor released her for full weight bearing on it. Her right ankle, which was the more severely injured, still has a lot of healing to go. She is still not weight bearing on it and her therapists think that it will be a few more months before she can support herself with it. Progress isn’t always made in leaps and bounds; sometimes it is made in measured steps. However, considering how bad the accident was things could have been much worse. Yet another reason to be “Thankful”. I am thankful that my loving wife is alive and well. I am also thankful to the first responders, doctors, nurses, and therapists who have made her recovery possible. Unbelievably, I am also thankful for our insurance company who has stepped up and made most of the administrative side of this whole situation pretty easy to navigate. You don’t realize how simple your life really is until something comes along and knocks you off your axis, even still I know things could have been much more complicated.

As for me, I am learning my way through all of this. I have had to learned to be the type of husband Laura deserves and father that Andrew deserves. Unbelievably I just returned from two trips during the months of October (Atlanta, GA) and this month (Cancun, Mexico). Each trip was 10 days in duration and being away was extremely tough. I have also had to learn how to balance work and family a lot more effectively. Fortunately, my employer has made that very easy as well. I am “Thankful” to have a manager and employer who understand that sometimes life happens and are able to accomodate you when it does.

This entire experience has also made me extremely reflective and I have begun to rethink my career goals and where I’d like to go next. The one certainty is that I will be staying with my present employer because it is really a great place to work, but I am contemplating moving from my current role as a Learning Developer for our Volunteer Leadership program to a role within our Information Technology group. I am really longing to get back to a full-time involvement in technology and hopefully make my informal role as an emerging technology / social media expert (at least within my organization) something more formal.

Needless to say my life is constantly evolving and I really do miss my days of being able to blog and socialize with all of my association colleagues. But while I do long for the days of old, I know that soon enough I’ll be able to find my balance and return to a new sense of normal. I’m “Thankful” that I will have the opportunity to do that.

Thanks again to all of you for your support and kind words during the past few months. I wish you and your families a Happy Thanksgiving.

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